Bush's Accomplishment

I have obtained reliable evidence of a threat that will destroy . . . not a few buildings . . . not even a city . . . but a whole state. The nature of this attack is such that it should be possible to move most of the people out of the damage zone ahead of this destruction. However, every piece of infrastructure – road, railroad, airport, home, business, and park will be rendered unusable.

Furthermore, you received intelligence on this threat at about the same time that people were warning you about Al Queida. Unfortunately, you did not care. You dismissed the news as unimportant.

This is the really interesting report. The people that these intelligence reports said would attack the United States – they were your friends and campaign contributors. In fact, any reasonable examination of the evidence would suggest that they put you in office precisely so that you could disarm the nation against their threat, allowing them to act with impunity.

Of course, these assailants were not acting on religious zeal. They were acting on pure profit motive. They saw a way to make a couple billion dollars, and all that it required was the destruction of one American state. And you agreed to be their front man, sent in to the Capital like a Trojan horse to destroy this nation’s defenses so that this attack could succeed.

Scientists now report that, over the course of the next century, America will lose 25,000 square miles of land due to sea level rise due to global warming. This is equivalent to the state of West Virginia . . . gone . . . totally destroyed. This figure only considers the land in the 48 contiguous states, and does not include the damage that will be done to Hawaii and Alaska.

The amount of land will be equivalent to that of West Virginia, but the quality of the land (the land value) will be much higher. This will be coastal land – coastal roads, coastal buildings, coastal parks, coastal businesses, homes, lives, and livelihoods.

We could have prevented this threat. We could have mobilized this country against it. It might have cost a couple of hundred billion dollars – though it probably would not have cost any lives lost or bodies mangled. But it would be worth it to protect this country from such a threat, would it not?

Oh, I forgot again. The people launching this attack were your friends and supporters. You worked for them.

I hope that you are proud of what you have accomplished.